bixbiboom:

(Ronin fusses lightly and blows bubbles)

“Yep, and what else? Like, do you have any… any critiques for me? On–on, like, my parenting style?”

(Ronin fusses harder)

“Yeah, yeah, no, I got that.”

[transition]

(Ronin makes tiny baby struggle noises throughout)

“Yeah, no, I just feel like you’re a little inconsistent, you know? Like your critiques are just a little… hot and cold. If there was just more of, like, a through-line, I feel like, you know, maybe I could learn a little bit more about… you.”

[transition]

(Ronin is quiet until Aragorn appears, begins making soft baby noises)

“I also don’t know if I’m encouraged or unsurprised at the fact that when Lord of the Rings is on, you… you chill out–oh, Aragorn, yeah, he’s right there. Smeagol, though, you didn’t like that face, did you? Can you show them what–”

[transition]

“I thought it might’ve been the bandaid that you got from your first shot today, but no, it was the massive dump and fart that you just ripped against me like a champ. So proud!”